Our New Chapter

Let's just start with a disclosure that this post isn't going to be as eloquently worded as many of my others, but I've decided to go this route because I believe a typical Facebook post doesn't allow for enough room or explanation.

This blog is about life. My life and the life of my family. It is filled with the good, the bad, and the ugly. Sometimes the cards we're dealt are less than ideal, but we roll with the punches, rejoice in the good, and survive. 

This week has been about survival in our family. And I thank each and every one of you for your kind words, prayers, concern, and support. I was hoping to update everyone when we had more information, but our journey toward an explanation and answers looks as though it will be longer than we anticipated, so at this point I'm just going to update everyone and try to keep you in the loop as we move forward.

This winter has been a hard one for our family. The move across the country, living in hotels for a few months, new germs, etc... So, we've all been sick on and off and it just hasn't been fun. But now that we're settled in our new house and into a routine, we've been able to get back into the groove, so to say. And with a groove, comes balance and a chance to catch our breath and address nagging issues we've been ignoring with the chaos. 

Nic has had a persistent cough for the last few months, but like I said, with everything going on, he had chalked it up to congestion and kept chugging along. Well, on Tuesday he went in for some antibiotics and came home with a chest x-ray showing a large mass in his chest cavity and instructions to go directly to an ER. 

It was a shock to him, a shock to me, and a shock to our friend down the street when I barged in and left her with 3 kids. 

In all seriousness though, I need to take a moment and thank our Air Force Family. You have been there for Nic, the kids, and I from the first moment we arrived in New Jersey and this last week has been a rough one and you've rallied around us, helped with kids, food, hospital visits, and endless offers of support. It has truly been appreciated beyond words and I'm not sure what I would have done without you. So - THANK YOU. I only hope that I have the opportunity to return the favors one day. 

Back to ER visit number 1. Nic and I arrived pretty shaken up. It was a long day, lots of waiting and sitting. They did a CAT scan that confirmed the large mass. 15cm x 11cm x 7cm. It appears to be in the chest cavity, pressing on his aorta and trachea - which is causing the cough. He was admitted to the hospital and they did a biopsy to collect a small tissue sample on Wednesday. 

Reinforcement #1, Grandma Charla, also arrived Wednesday. So, after the biopsy, they discharged Nic, with instructions to return to the ER if any new symptoms appeared before results, which were expected by Tuesday. So, we left with Grandma, collected the kids on the way home, and hoped to at least get them back into their normal routine for stability and comfort. 

On Thursday, Xander woke up with a runny nose and not quite his normal appetite, but he seemed happy as normal, so we put Cole on the bus and walked him to school, showing Grandma the ropes so she could pick up the slack if need be. I went on a quick run, trying to clear my mind and Nic cleaned his truck, in an effort to do the same. Just about 9:30 I got a call from the school that Xander was in the nurses office "not acting like himself and a bit lethargic" - thank goodness I was still in my running clothes, because I got my sprint workout in as I ran as fast as I could to the school, knowing lethargic and Xander isn't a good combo. 

When I arrived he had just thrown up and was in the same state Nic and I had found him in last December when he had his first seizure. Limp and unresponsive. Nic walked in as he had headed over with the stroller (you must know that it is much faster to walk from our house to the school than to drive - hence why we were both on foot) - the ambulance was called and I sprinted back to the house for our emergency meds. Once I was back, he was twitchy, but crying - which is what he did last time as he was coming out of it. So, we didn't give the emergency meds, but we did take an ambulance ride back to the hospital for ER visit #2, and day #3. 

We spent the afternoon in the ER with Xander, monitoring him. Not too long after I arrived at the hospital, I received an automated call from the school, saying it was in lock down. So, I of course called Grandma, made sure Cole got off the bus, which he had and told her that I don't know what is going on, but she needed to lock the doors to be safe, just due to the proximity of the school to our house. 

As texts from neighbors started coming in, I tried to keep mom updated from the ER. There was an assault at the 7-11 and the suspects fled into our neighborhood, could be armed, everyone was to shelter in place. First of all - brilliant, fleeing onto military base housing - really??? Anyhow, Grandma, Ella, and Cole had quite a show - helicopters, dozens of police, weapons of all shapes and sizes, dogs - it was pretty crazy to say the least. The whole incident was wrapping up just as Nic and I brought Xander home from the ER. 

We couldn't help but laugh - I mean really, you can't make this kind of stuff up!

On Friday, Xander woke up with a low fever, but other than that, thankfully, besides sleeping more than normal, he's been acting pretty much like himself. So, Nic and I decided we could go to a BBQ to take our mind off things. Cole was playing with friends that are moving this week, so we decided to just let him play and grandma kept the kids for us. 

Nic's oncologist called while we were at the BBQ. The biopsy came back inconclusive. The tissue sample they had taken was dead cells - which could yield no answers, so it will be another week until we know anything for sure. That wasn't exactly what we were hoping for - we are planners and therefore are waiting for our plan of attack. The unknown is not fun to say the least. 

So, our new time frame is a PET scan on Wednesday, an apt with the surgeon on Friday for a more invasive biopsy, and a follow-up with the oncologist next Monday (June 1). 

ER visit #3 happened after the BBQ. Nic started feeling a little off and being that he is on high alert for any new symptoms, we rushed back in, only to spend the next 8 hours sitting and waiting. They did another CAT scan of his head and thankfully, found a brain and nothing else ;) 

So, at 2am on Saturday morning, we were discharged and headed home - yes, if you are keeping track that is technically 3 ER visits, and 5 days in the hospital in 5 days :( - Hence why we need the continued prayers and are so very grateful for Grandma being here. 

Reinforcements #2 and #3 are arriving this week. The kids are excited to see Grandma and Grandpa Rowe and we are hoping for some good news. So, please, continue to keep us in your prayers as we navigate this new chapter of our lives. 

I will update when I can. 

We love you all and know that we are in good spirits and determined to fight whatever this is! 

Thank you all for your love and support.